Mood Mint Madness
by testosterone-tea
Summary: When Harry and Ron agree to test out the new Mood Mints for Fred and George, they thought it was all a lark. What will they do when it not only turns out the mints have an unexpected function, but Malfoy gets ahold of them? Harry has a plan! Can he outwit Malfoy before he tells the death eaters about what the mints really do? Slash, eventual sexytimes.
1. Chapter 1

"What are you staring at, Potter?" Malfoy snarled, the corner of his mouth curling up in derision.

Harry could only stare in mute fascination at the light violet glow surrounding his arch nemesis, shocked into utter silence.

Malfoy sneered at him and tried again, "I see your brain's gone the way of Longbottom's. Just wait, next your bank account will go the way of Weasley's."

Harry knew that Malfoy was insulting him and that he should do something about it, such as hex Malfoy's mouth shut. But he was entirely beyond anything but confused horror. No matter what expression or gesture Malfoy made, the purple corona wouldn't budge.

"Did you hear me, Potter?" Malfoy waved a hand in front of his face. "Your face reminds me of the back end of a hippogriff."

Obviously it didn't, if the purple glow could be believed. Which Harry wasn't entirely sure it could be, and he was going to find out immediately. Without another word, he turned and walked away, leaving Malfoy staring after him with a perplexed look on his face, and a purple light surrounding him.

As soon as he entered the Common Room, he searched out his friends, picking them out from the rest of the Gryffindors easily. He marched over to where they were sitting on chairs in front of the fireplace and asked, "Ron, you know those things that Fred and George wanted us to test for them?"

"Yeah, what about it?" Ron shrugged. "Something wrong?"

There certainly was, in Harry's opinion. "Is yours working properly?"

"Yeah, mate." Ron turned to Hermione and flushed slightly. "At least I think it is."

Ron himself, as well as Hermione were both surrounded by a light green glow. Hermione didn't even so much as glance up from her book on Advanced Runes, having chosen not to participate in the testing of yet another Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes product. The Mood Mints had arrived this morning during breakfast with the instructions to only eat one, and that the effects would last 24 hours.

"Um, you didn't happen to see Malfoy today, did you?" Harry asked, fidgeting with his cloak and hoping that it was just a prank the twins had cooked up for the two of them.

"Yeah, mate, I did. Called me a few names, insulted my family and pranced off, like normal. Why?"

"What colour was he?"

"Red. Obviously, Harry. He hates me, remember? Why, what colour was he when you looked at him?"

Harry was not about to tell Ron about Malfoy's previously unrealized amorous intent towards himself and nodded hastily, "Yeah, red. That's what I thought."

Ron nodded and went back to pretending to study while actually doodling a little comic in the sidelines of his notes, but Hermione finally raised her head, frowning suspiciously.

"What do these Mood Mints do, exactly?" Hermione glanced back and forth between them.

"Oh, just tells you what feelings a person has towards you. Shows up as a glowing light in different colours around their head. Harry there is green when I look at him cause he's my mate."

For some reason, this caused Hermione's face to contort in horror and her cheeks to go bright red. Harry raised his eyebrows, but Hermione didn't look at either of them before quickly gathering up her notes and dashing off up the stairs to the girls' dorms.

"What was that all about?" Harry squinted at Ron.

"Ah..." Ron blushed, but looked faintly pleased. "When I look at her, she's purple."

"Oh," Harry said, drooping as he considered the unfortunate implications. "Good luck, mate."

Ron nodded, humming to himself as he returned to his doodles.

It was all very well and good for Ron, because Harry had no doubts that had Hermione actually had one of the mints, Ron would show up as purple to her, too. He was happy for them, and hoped that maybe now they would finally _finally_ get together.

They didn't have bloody _Malfoy_ turning up purple for them.

Maybe there was something wrong with them, a glitch or problem and it would go away by tomorrow. Yes, that had to be it. He took some parchment out of his satchel to start doing his Potions essay that was due the next day content in the knowledge that by then, the problem would sort itself out. Malfoy would be red, and balance would return to the world.

The next day started out bad and became steadily worse. He woke up late, missed breakfast and had to rush to get dressed in order to get to Potions on time. Halfway down the stairs, he tripped and almost fell the rest of the way down. Then, he realized he'd forgotten the essay and had to go back up and get it. The result was that he was late for Potions, earning him a detention.

"Since you've finally decided to grace us with your presence, can you hurry up and sit down already?" Snape scowled at him from behind a curtain of oily black hair.

Harry looked around, but the only spot open was next to Malfoy.

The entire Slytherin side of the dungeon glowed red – except Malfoy, who was still stubbornly purple. Slowly, Harry made his way over and warily took a seat next to Malfoy, edging his seat further away.

"Typical Potter, always running late," Malfoy hissed under his breath.

"Belt up, Malfoy," Harry shot back and added his essay to the pile on Snape's desk with a flick of his wrist.

Harry didn't know how this could get any worse. He was stuck beside Malfoy on a lecture day in which Snape would drone on about potion's theory in between insulting Harry, Neville and the rest of Gryffindor in that order. No doubt, Malfoy would flaunt his potions knowledge and gain Slytherin a ton of extra points. Not to mention, Malfoy was still, irritatingly, purple.

He decided to forego taking notes in favour of doodling stick-figure Quidditch players on his parchment. What he really should have been doing was paying attention to Malfoy, as he was up to his mischief, as usual.

"What's this, Potter? Not sharing your candy with the rest of us?" Malfoy asked gleefully.

Harry turned so fast that he felt a muscle in his back twinge in protest. Malfoy was grinning devilishly and holding up the packet of Mood Mints that the twins had sent him. He'd obviously been digging around in Harry's stuff and found the one thing that Harry wouldn't want him to see.

"I wonder how they taste," Malfoy continued, examining one.

"No, wait – " Harry held out a hand as if to stop him, forgetting magic in his panic.

Malfoy simply smiled smugly before popping it into his mouth. A moment later, his eyes widened as he looked around the room, no doubt seeing a myriad of colours. He frowned down at the packet in his hand, but there was no explanation, seeing as the letter was still up in Harry's bedside table. He glanced around, taking in who turned what colour, and no doubt trying to figure out what it all meant.

"It figures that Gryffindor would be red," Malfoy muttered, frowning. "Crabbe, Goyle and Blaise are all green... Theo's orange... Pansy's purple. Wait. You're purple. What does purple mean?"

Harry didn't hear a word after that. He saw Malfoy's mouth moving, but in his shock, his head was filled with white noise. It wasn't possible. He couldn't be purple, that was ridiculous.

He hated Malfoy.

This had to be a prank. There was no way that he liked _Malfoy_, of all the bloody people in the world. It was Fred and George's idea of a joke, and it was really not a funny one, in the least.

"Potter!" Snape glowered at him. "I've asked you three times now to answer the question. Answer, or I'll add on to your detention!"

He didn't remember what they were even talking about.

"Five?" he ventured.

Snape's eyebrows dipped. "Correct. I'm willing to bet that you can't tell me why."

Harry tried desperately to recall what they had been learning and glanced at Malfoy's notes, that were all neatly penned out in flowing and legible script.

"The Engleberg theory," he tried, having seen that near the bottom of the page.

Snape's frown deepened and he swirled around to walk to the other end of the classroom. "You still have detention with me, Potter."

"Potter, tell me what this stuff is!" Malfoy waved the mints under his nose.

He snatched them away from Malfoy and put them in his pocket. "Nothing you would be interested in. Quit talking to me! I'm not telling you anything!"

Malfoy smirked. "I guess that leaves me to figure it out myself. And I will find out, you can be sure of that, Potter."

Harry buried his face in his hands. He was so buggered.


	2. Chapter 2

To Harry's horror, Malfoy spent the rest of the day meticulously cataloguing who turned what colour on a piece of parchment. He managed to catch a glimpse of it over lunchtime, while Malfoy sat in the Great Hall with his friends, furiously scribbling, and glancing around once in a while to take another look. He caught Harry watching him, and smirked at him. Harry's cheeks flared with heat and he quickly ducked back out of the Hall before Malfoy could figure out what was going on.

As for himself, there was an alarming amount of purple directed his way, and it was no wonder it had taken so long to pick Malfoy out of the vast multitude. In fact, Malfoy wasn't even the only Slytherin to be purple, although all of Malfoy's yearmates were red.

Sometime in the afternoon, the mint glow faded, and he heaved a sigh of relief.

"Hey, did yours fade already?" Ron asked over dinner.

"Yeah, mate, it did. Do you think they really work?" Harry asked, still worried.

Ron shoved another dinner roll in his mouth and nodded. "Sure, but there's really only one way to be sure. We should take another one."

Ron glanced over at Hermione, who had seated herself next to Ginny rather than either of them. Harry could tell that Ron wasn't sure whether Hermione really liked him and wanted to test it out to be certain. Harry could have told him that he was pretty sure she did, but he wanted to have an excuse to see for himself if they were wrong.

"We might as well, we did say we'd test them thoroughly," Harry nodded decisively. "They gave us a whole bag of them, after all."

He dug around in his satchel and pulled them out, tossing one over to Ron and popping one into his own mouth. He was so distracted by the flare of colour that danced up around everyone that he didn't see Malfoy until it was too late.

"Accio mints!"

Harry supposed he should have realized that Malfoy would be hanging around to try and get one up on him, but he hadn't thought of it until right now.

"Give those here, Malfoy!" he demanded angrily, teeth clenching.

"I think not, Potter," Malfoy smirked at him.

Harry stood, ready to duel with his nemesis over the issue when Snape loomed up, standing between the two and looking back and forth between them.

"I see your temper has got the better of you again, Potter," he said, eyebrows raised.

"Malfoy took my mints, Professor," he growled, glaring at Malfoy, who looked far too pleased with himself. "Give them back, Malfoy!"

"Now, now Mr. Potter. You should learn to share," Snape smiled slickly, sharing a smirk with Malfoy.

"That's not fair, sir," he tried, knowing it was futile.

"I could always give you another detention, Mr. Potter," Snape said, taking Malfoy by one shoulder and steering him back towards the Slytherin table.

"What a git," Ron snarled from beside him, slumping back into his seat. "I hate the pair of them!"

Harry nodded miserably, knowing that Malfoy was definitely clever enough, in spite of being a complete wanker, to figure out the puzzle. He'd have all the data he needed if he even had only one other person to test it out on. He had an entire bag of the mints at his disposal and would no doubt put them to good use.

The real problem was not Malfoy figuring out what they were used for, since the twins were going to start selling them at the shop. It was that Harry turned up purple for Malfoy.

Hang on. He frowned and turned around to where Malfoy and Snape were standing by the Slytherin table. The two Slytherins were examining the bag of mints and seemed to be hurriedly discussing them, their heads close together. Malfoy was still purple.

Snape was green.

Harry stared in fascination, certain that the mints weren't working properly now. The mints were telling him that Snape was a friend. He'd been so distracted by Malfoy being purple that he'd completely overlooked the fact that _Snape_ was _green_. That wasn't possible, he absolutely loathed Harry! This was the proof then, that the mints weren't working.

He had to tell Fred and George right away.

"Ron," he hissed. "What colour is Snape to you?"

Ron turned to him, rolling his eyes, then did a double take. "Mate, he's green. I thought for sure he'd turn up red, cause he hates our guts. I was so preoccupied with Hermione's glow being purple, I didn't really notice anyone else's colours..."

"We've both been distracted," Harry admitted. "What do we do? They can't be working right, not if Snape is turning up bloody green!"

"We'll owl the twins tonight," Ron promised.

The next morning, Harry waited anxiously for signs of Pig returning with the twin's response. He was already nervous, and it didn't help that Malfoy kept shooting him suspicious looks. He thought that maybe the mints weren't working like they were supposed to, and Malfoy might have figured out what they were actually doing. But it wasn't as if he could just ask Malfoy.

He was busy watching Malfoy, so when Pig arrived, he didn't notice until the small owl had flailed into a jug of pumpkin juice and sent it all over Harry's front.

"Sorry, mate," Ron muttered, grabbing the letter from Pig while Hermione tutted and spelled the mess away with a wave of her wand.

Harry watched Ron's face as he scanned the letter, and felt disappointment rise in him when Ron's face twisted in a scowl.

"They don't know what's up, mate. They're sending us some more, so we can try and figure it out ourselves. They said they'd try it out too, from their end."

"Problem?" Hermione asked, raising an eyebrow from behind the book she'd brought with her to the breakfast table.

Harry and Ron exchanged a glance.

Ron heaved a sigh. "Well, you see..."

That night, Hermione was sketching out a similar diagram to Malfoy's categorizing what colours everybody were from both Ron and Harry's point of view. It was taking her ages, even with use of magic, to cross-reference them all.

"So, to both of you, Snape is green."

Harry nodded sleepily from his position next to the fire. Ron had already told her his part, including the part where Hermione was purple for him. Afterward, he'd been flustered and fled up to the sixth year dorms, saying he was tired and was going to sleep.

"And the Slytherins are red?" Hermione bit her lip. "I can see why that would be."

"Not everyone," Harry admitted. "A few of them are purple. Actually, an alarming amount of people on this chart are purple for me."

"Alright, who?"

Harry listed them off, wondering whether he should tell her about Malfoy.

"Is that all?" she asked, frowning down at her list.

Harry paused.

"Harry," Hermione admonished. "I need a complete set of data if I'm to figure out what's going on!"

Harry sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "There's one other person of mine who is purple. But I warn you, it doesn't make sense to me."

Hermione nodded and waited, quill poised.

"It's Malfoy," he whispered, voice low so that no one would hear. "Malfoy is purple. And that's not all that worries me."

Hermione leaned in closer, sensing his discomfort.

"When Malfoy stole the first mint, he listed off a few people around us and what their colours were." Harry took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I was purple for him, too."

Hermione's eyes widened in shock. "Are you sure, Harry?"

"Yes," Harry dipped his head briefly in a slight nod. "He turns up purple, for more than one mint. I don't understand, Hermione. Why would both of us be purple?"

"I don't see a pattern yet," Hermione frowned and bit her lip again, fiercely. "We'll have to wait until we get more data. Sorry, Harry, we'll have to wait until the twins send us more mints."

Harry nodded, but the twinge of worry in his gut was growing stronger the longer the mystery went unsolved.

Hermione was on the case now. It was only a matter of time until this was sorted.

This is what he told himself, but he still couldn't sleep that night.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: This work is for entertainment and not profit, and all characters and places from Harry Potter belong to J.K. Rowling.**

* * *

Malfoy was really beginning to alarm Harry.

He was following Harry around the castle, just far enough back that whenever Harry tried to turn around to catch him, he'd slip away before Harry could get to him. Harry had no idea what had brought this on, only that it was rather worrying. Had Malfoy figured out what the Mood Mints did, or was he still trying to puzzle it out?

It's not as if he could just ask the prat.

Even Ron and Hermione had noticed.

"I'll go push his head in," Ron offered, scowling in the direction of blond hair.

"No, Ron, don't," Hermione scolded him. "We need to find out what he's up to, and the best way is to keep letting Malfoy follow Harry around."

"What?" Harry yelped. "Why would we do that? What if he's plotting my demise at this very moment? I'd like it if I could just relax for a moment without worrying that he was sneaking up behind me."

"Well, what we could do is wait until Malfoy is following Harry and then me and you could sneak up on him under the invisibility cloak. Maybe we can find out what he's up to," Hermione suggested.

"Can't we just all be under the cloak and spy on him?" Harry griped, seeing no reason why he should act as bait.

"We're too tall to all fit under anymore," Hermione pointed out. "We need to lead him to a place in the castle where following him would be easiest, and Harry can lead him there."

"Can we ambush him?" Ron asked, perking up a bit at the thought.

"Not yet, we don't want to make him suspicious," Hermione sighed. "So should we do it after dinner?"

"I suppose," Ron shrugged.

"No, let's not do that!" Harry didn't really like that Malfoy was tailing him everywhere and he really didn't want to be followed by Malfoy when his friends weren't there as back-up. Plus, it was starting to get a bit creepy.

"Come off it, Harry," Ron moaned. "We need you to do this. Otherwise we'll never figure out what Malfoy's up to."

"Fine," Harry griped. "But if this doesn't work out, it's not my fault!"

After dinner, Harry scowled as he handed over his Cloak and watched longingly as his friends disappeared underneath it. The last he saw of them was Ron's cheery face and a wave of his freckled hand, and then they were gone. Then, he very purposely set off for the Great Hall, knowing that he would undoubtedly pick up his Malfoy tail there.

He and Malfoy saw one another the moment he set foot in the Great Hall, and Harry's footsteps slowed. Malfoy glared at him over the top of a textbook, pale eyes fixated on his face. Harry kept walking, not really paying attention to anything in front of him. Malfoy didn't move an inch, just sat there at the Slytherin table, watching him. As he drew closer, Harry frowned.

There was something wrong. He glared back at Malfoy, but nothing about him obviously gave away what it was.

Harry walked out the other side of the Great Hall, bottom lip caught between his teeth. It was either leave or confront Malfoy, and right now he had nothing to go on. But something had been odd about that little staring contest.

He stopped a few corridors over, wondering whether or not Ron and Hermione had followed him or had stayed with Malfoy. The doors opened, and he saw a head of pale hair emerge. So Malfoy was taking the bait after all. Harry had been worried that maybe Malfoy had suspected a trap and not followed him. Now all he had to do was lead Malfoy into a secluded hallway and they could confront him together. He stayed just in Malfoy's line of sight, disappearing around a corner only just so that Malfoy knew where he'd gone.

As he lead Malfoy it occurred to him that Malfoy should have been suspicious by now. He knows he would have been at this point, but Malfoy doesn't look in the least concerned. He pauses to watch Malfoy walk down the hall towards him. There's definitely something wrong, something tugging at the back of his head shouting alarm bells.

He wondered if they should make their move now. They are in a spot that should be secluded enough for their purposes.

Suddenly it hit him.

Malfoy was walking wrong. He had a very unique way of swaggering, and although the person walking at the end of the hall was doing a fair imitation, Harry knew Malfoy's walk when he saw it. Sometimes he didn't even have to see the blond of his hair or the green edge to his robes to know who it was. That wasn't Malfoy. He'd been sitting wrong, too, in the Great Hall. But if that wasn't Malfoy, where was...

"Hands on your head, Potter."

Of course. Of course Malfoy wasn't fooled.

He turned, raising his hands as he went. Malfoy was smirking at him from the other end of the wand levelled at his face.

"Come on," Malfoy jerked the wand to the side. "Move."

Harry was forced deeper into the maze of corridors, knowing that by now Hermione and Ron had probably figured out something was wrong and would be on their way. He should have realized this was a trap. They walked for several minutes until Malfoy deemed them far enough away.

"Tell me, Potter," he said, grinning, teeth glinting in the dim light. "Where did you get those mints?"

"None of your business, Malfoy!" he spat.

Malfoy laughed. "Oh, I know where they're from already. I just like seeing you all riled up. The Weasel twins, obviously. Made for the war effort, were they?"

Harry frowned. They hadn't been made for the war at all. They'd been made to sell for fun and games, like most of what the twins created.

"Figured out what they're for then?" Harry shot back.

"Oh, indeed," Malfoy's eyes, his _real_ eyes glinted triumphantly. "It was a simple matter, really. I've even discovered what purple means, Potter."

Well piss. Harry didn't know what the purple meant at all, so he simply clenched his mouth shut and glared in return.

"How many others will see you as purple, hm, Potter? Not many, I'll wager. I guess this puts me in a rather... unique position."

"Piss off, Malfoy!" he hissed, but Malfoy laughed.

"We both know that's not what you want at all, isn't that right?"

"I hate you," Harry growled, wishing that he could go for his wand, but knowing that the moment he did that Malfoy would do something nasty to him.

"Be that as it may..." Malfoy smirked. "Doesn't change anything, does it?"

Well that was interesting. Malfoy knew what they did, but was unsurprised that Harry could have a purple glow and still hate him.

So what was Malfoy trying to do?

At that very moment, he heard a yell echo down the hall and almost sighed in relief. His back-up was finally here.

"Get away from him, Malfoy!"

"Ah, your little lions have returned," Malfoy smiled, like a snake regarding its prey. "I suppose I'll have to bid you farewell, Potter. But not before I start the game off!"

Harry didn't know what to expect, but it certainly wasn't what happened.

Malfoy reached out with the hand not holding his wand and seized the back of Harry's head in a vice-like grasp, clenching his fingers through his messy hair. He yanked Harry towards him, drawing him in close. Harry could feel the heat of his body against his front. Malfoy's mouth crashed onto his, hot and invasive.

Harry gasped in complete and utter shock. Malfoy's other hand came up to grasp his jaw, seemingly uncaring that the motion brought his wand into contact with Harry's face. Malfoy's kiss was more attack than embrace, pushing him back at the same time as drawing him in, enveloping him. He was all fire and spice. His lips tasted like cinnamon as they consumed him, teeth nipping at his lip and tongue tracing his mouth.

A moment later, Malfoy was gone, just a whip of the edge of his cloak disappearing around a corner. Harry panted from his place against the stone wall of the corridor where he'd ended up somehow while his mouth was occupied. Ron and Hermione had stormed up and were on either side of him, watching his face apprehensively.

Harry raised his fingers to the curve of his mouth. His lips still pulsed with heat, aching from the assault against them.

"Are you okay, Harry?" Hermione ventured to ask quietly.

"Yeah, mate," Ron added. "What was that about?"

"He's figured out what the mints do, but he doesn't realize that we don't know yet," Harry said, slightly dazed. "He was taunting me about the colours, and trying to get a rise out of me, which was pretty hard considering that I don't know what he was trying to imply."

"What did he say?" Hermione was in full-research mode, ready to get down to business.

"He thinks they're for the war effort," Harry shrugged. "It's odd, cause that's not what I would have guessed at all."

Hermione froze. "I think I have an idea. I won't know for sure that it's what they're for until we have more data." She turned to Ron. "Did you ask the twins for more mints?"

"Yeah, ages ago!" Ron nodded vigorously. "They should be here any day."

"We'd better hope so," Hermione muttered as she began to lead the way back to Gryffindor tower. "Cause if I'm right, we could have stumbled on something that could be a great aid to us all, but is also potentially very dangerous."

"I hate it when she doesn't tell us what she's thinking," Ron sighed as he followed her.

Harry pushed up off the wall and trailed after them, fingers reaching up again to touch his mouth. If he brushed his tongue over his lips, he could still taste Malfoy on them. The worst thing about this was, that while his mind roared in rage, his body... his body wanted more.

A unique position, did Malfoy say?

Well, what Malfoy didn't realize that he was purple for Harry, too.


End file.
